I ain't readin' that

When I type this I think of some of my kiddos from my first year teaching in Charlestown and Scottsburg. I now empathize with them because sometimes I flat out refuse to read books that people tell me I need to read!

When I am Queen of the world (nothing I have ever desired for, but the phrase just works for this) parents of preemies will not have copies of "What to Expect" or the like. It's frustrating to determine your child's exact age (actual or gestational) and then compare developmental milestones to the age. I'm over it.

I'm thankful to be raising my first (and hopefully not only) child in a different country and continent because it is expanding my view. "Well, duh!" you may say, stating the obvious. The Japanese (Okinawan) approach to infancy is very similar to the American, but also different. Kids are exposed to barley tea and peach water, the emphasis on breastfeeding is different than in the States and car seats are suggested. In Japan kids walk to school on their own when they are 5-that is not dreamed of in the majority of the States.

My kid is healthy and happy. I had a bum placenta that caused him to be born in June instead of August. He smiles, he babbles, he loves other kids and he's being breastfed until he is 12 months old. He doesn't do everything according the week of his actual OR gestational age-he's already done some of them, still waiting on others. I don't read to him enough. He's not enrolled in Gymboree classes or in a play group (which, btw, are not made for working mothers here on the island of Okinawa). We provide him with a loving, safe environment. We talk though our days with him, we play with him and go for walks on the two days it doesn't rain. We laugh and play together. We also let him play on his own. We really don't know many people with a kid our age here, but he loves our babysitter's six year old granddaughter (who taught him to whistle among many other things). We feed him organic yogurt but he also gets the Gerber in the plastic container too. I think too many people try to do everything perfect and "by the books" and I'm at a stage where I ask why. My Grandmother had six children, my great grandmother ten. They didn't have books-they had common sense. I'm comfortable enough as a new mother to realize that I need to depend on my common sense (and my mom and co-workers who are experienced mothers). Dr. So and So probably has wonderful points and maybe at another stage of life I'll follow his book to a "T", but for now my son and I are following good old common sense.